A long post but worth it for some practical insights.
DISCLAIMER: This is purely out of my practice and work on the profound teachings of the Master and am only expressing what I have learnt from him and am still learning it. It has absolutely nothing to do with other’s experiences. You may accept it if you understand it in the right sense or please feel free to discard it
THE REAL UNCONDITIONAL LOVE
Unconditional love is a vibration and frequency of love of such high intensity that you automatically tend to look beyond any shortcomings you see outside of you, in others. There is no judgement or criticism because you have now accepted the person, his beliefs or his faith or his thinking, the way it is.
My Master taught these foundations of human existence. That is, accepting everyone and everything the way they are and forgiving everyone and everything.
In my practical work on this, I found that if you have ACCEPTANCE itself, there HAS to happen FORGIVENESS. Look vey deeply into this. And when one has ACCEPTANCE and FORGIVENESS there HAS to flow UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. Check it out. Work it out. Experience it out for yourself. The first two will automatically lead you to the third. These are the 3 pillars which my Master always emphasises.
I realised this was the quality of all the great liberated beings. Unconditional love is the highest stage or reflection of the state of a human spiritual evolution and not just as casually we talk about it. What we are talking is about love, the conditional one. Even the unconditional love that we almost all the time are referring to is nothing but conditional love itself.
CHECK YOUR UNCONDITIONAL LOVE STATUS
From my experience all these years, you cannot just begin emitting unconditional love just because you learnt about it. That is impossible. Those who feel they are emitting unconditional love are either faking it or are not fully aware of this state yet or in some kind of delusion. One cannot wake up to this state one fine morning; it needs years of practice or unless you are naturally born with this gift as a purified soul already.
Practising of first accepting everyone the way they are – if this is not perfect yet, forget unconditional love. Secondly, check – is there complete forgiveness? Again, many love to be in the delusion that we have forgiven all. In that case, right now, just remember the person you hate or the one who caused you harm or is giving you jitters. Does a smile come on your face or does love flow immediately to that person? If not, forget unconditional love.
Only these two checks are enough to know where we stand. So, reading and knowing about unconditional love or preaching to our near and dear ones about it is a totally different thing than actually living in that state experientially.
Whenever people talk to me about unconditional love the first thing that pops in me, at that very moment, is all the experiences I had or have with that person itself – believe me, in no way I could relate to anything called unconditional love, which made me realise that it is so easy to speak about it but so hard to follow and practice it! If i pierced into our experiences, i could see nothing in their so-called unconditional love but only “conditions apply” everywhere. Now, am not trying to judge anyone but just refusing to be fooled.
Now, I don’t say I am an unconditional love’ly’ person but am sure working straight on it, practising it in various ways, exploring about it by reflection, studying great ones who were in a state of unconditional love and so on. Yet a lot of work needed.
SELF WORK ON THIS GREAT QUALITY
Self-analysis and (honest) contemplation is very, very important or you will end up glorifying yourself to be the perfect one, which is how illusion works and even prohibits one from moving further. We must have the courage to reveal (to ourselves and not necessarily to others) that we haven’t reached there yet. And if we haven’t reached there how can we profess unconditional love so casually to others? It would be sheer hypocrisy, right?
Then, how to know if you are benefiting or evolving in these qualities?
Just contemplate periodically and observe your reaction to any living being. If there is a reaction then it’s not perfected yet. But then, also look back over the years and compare yourself with yourself over the years and if you see a good improvement then you are doing great! That is how you measure your evolution. Are the people, places, things, situations that was once causing you so much of disgust, anger, frustration, irritation, etc now not disturbing your state of mind like before? Excellent then! There certainly is good progress because the grace of the master and his teachings are certainly working on you! But then, would you call yourself an unconditional being of love or would you call yourself the one who is working towards it? That humility would help you work more better and with more clarity and sincerity.
Without such practice and constant observing yourself and your own mind and emotions never conclude you are an unconditional love creature. That will only boost the ego and also will refrain you from reflecting, observing and watching yourself anymore, for why will a perfect man look at his own flaws. He will only believe that he doesn’t need to look within.
WHAT UNCONDITIONAL LOVE IS NOT….
Also, most importantly, unconditional love doesn’t mean unconditional acceptance of abuse or wrong treatment towards you. Please use common sense here, for i have seen innocent ones falling flat to abusers, thinking to be okay with abuse is following unconditional love. I have seen most of the mishaps happening with people on this and so wish to shed deeper insights to it. i once saw one abusing the other and taking advantage of the other innocent one and then preaching unconditional love into their ears making them believe that they must tolerate or accept the abuser the way he is. The victim’s false state of unconditional love makes them falsely believe that it is okay to accept wrong treatment. No, it is not okay! This abuser then even had the nerve to later say “Oh, doesn’t the teaching say you must forgive?” The victim, if just a fanatic, will say “Yes I forgive you, I accept you and I also unconditionally love you.” The abuser will smile in having taught the great teachings to a fool and continue abusing while the victim suffer in the state of wrong definition of unconditional love. So, you can see how great teachings can be manipulated also. Common sense dear ones.
Jesus was always in a state of unconditional love and he even forgave the people with a smile while they were torturing him. You relate this with the victim i was talking about. Both examples look so similar, right? Difference is Jesus was not affected by the person’s act and could see how the evil doer is doing such thing out of ignorance and that is how unconditional love flowed towards the doer. But in the case of the victim, the victim only felt fear, helplessness, anger, etc and had no love at all for the abuser but she had the false notion that she must have unconditional love, no matter what. Too much of ethical blackmailing made the person feel “Oh but I must love unconditionally.”
Liberated beings do it from a totally different perspective. Think for a while. Did Jesus not in his lifetime flee places to avoid being persecuted? Did he not avoid people to avoid being harassed? Did he not go and literally thrash people out who were doing wrong in the temple? Did he not speak sternly the truth to unjust? Lord Krishna, an ocean of unconditional love, did he not take decisions in Kurukshetra that will not make anyone believe that he had unconditional love for others? See any great ones, for that instance.
They were all epitome of unconditional love which you and me cannot even fathom. But they were ones who did their dharma and did everything to tackle people and situations but they never became bitter with it. That is unconditional love. They never held grudges with the wrong-doers. That is unconditional love. Their purified state of unconditional love saw all nonsense around and thus they dealt with it with greater maturity, while actually being totally unaffected by the ones who did it. They did what they had to do because they had their eyes on their mission and not the obstacles or the problem creators. They clearly saw through why someone is doing that and because of their such understanding they could easily forgive and also accept the person.
That is the quality of Shiva, around whom even the bhoota ganas dance in freedom. He loves the good and the bad equally which is why he is referred to as Bhola. That is unconditional love. This is how Jesus or Krishna also looked at people too at all times, but they never tolerated nonsense. Jesus said, “Hate not the sinners but their sins.” That is unconditional love. That is the very quality of Rama too, who had zero-tolerance to not Ravana but Ravana’s bad qualities. If he did not have that, he would not have asked his brother Laxmana to go take upadesha from Ravana before his death, before he himself terminated Ravana. What he terminated was not the person Ravana but his qualities after which he bowed in respect to Ravana. That is unconditional love.
LEARNING UNCONDITIONAL LOVE FROM PRACTITIONERS OF UNCONDITIONAL LOVE…
That is why they are called Masters, because they have mastery over their teachings. I have written on my previous many posts how I have seen my Master also following the same principles on many occasions. When everyone judged and criticised someone, he would say that today the person’s consciousness is low due to which he/she acted that way but tomorrow there is always a chance that he/she will evolve. That is why judgement or a final conclusion was never made on the “sinner”. That is unconditional love. If anyone did him harm of even a great unpardonable deal, one honest apology from them or repentance, he immediately turned into ball of joy. That is unconditional love. He prayed for the well of those who hurt him or did wrong. That is unconditional love.
See, this is the state of being from where acceptance and forgiveness truly comes from, not from mere verbal repetition of the teachings. That is why i always prefer to learn from practitioners of the teachings and not teachers or preachers of the teachings. Big difference…
So, in practical life also, dear ones, be wary of any acts, deeds, situations, thoughts, actions coming from others which if is not in the intention of highest good, do not accept it or be unconditionally okay with it. Admonish the sin but be unconditional (only internally) with the sinner, but you can certainly be stern so as to not encourage it. Meaning, not to take the sinner or his acts too seriously but at the same time not allowing it in the name unconditional love. That is what the whole practice and mastery of these three precious teachings are about.
It takes even a lifetime of self-practice, self-corrections and self-inspection to even master the basic foundational teachings of a Master and bringing it eventually into living practice. That is what sadhna is all about. What use is that sadhna that we sit with eyes closed for hours and then do everything that is opposite to what is being taught basically. The problem only happens when we feel these are easy nursery teachings which we feel we know by-heart and taking them for granted, we eagerly strive and wait for higher teachings. Nothing is going happen without mastering the foundational ones, for it is only on these that the higher teachings are built upon.
So, unconditional love is not the most happening modern ‘YO’ word of excitement but is a practical 24×7 state of experiential bliss from where nothing but only love oozes. It is from experiences of the glimpses of it that i speak of it with conviction. Goal is to achieve a consistent state of it. It is liberation itself. So achieving that state is self-realisation itself or achieving self-realisation is what will bring one automatically into the state of unconditional love. Divine Love and Light 💛✨